Real Teens Speak Out

I Am His Advocate

I have an 18 year old daughter and 10 year old twin boys.  We are a very close family and I am very involved in their school and life.  The older our children get the more independent they become and the less they want their parents around. 

Nonetheless, I probe and talk and spend what time I can with them.  Two weeks before Christmas one of my 10 year old twins came home from school, wrapped a cord around his neck and attempted to hang himself.  His sister found him and from there was a whirlwind of four weeks of intense inpatient and outpatient therapy for my son as well as the rest of us. 

He had been bullied for months on the bus and in school and decided the only way to stop the bullying was to end his life. This was the first indication for me that anything was wrong with him.  After therapy he was still depressed and apprehensive to return to school but had to due to state regulations and because of the insurance companies denying payment for further treatment. 

So my son returned to school where the bullying continued and again two weeks later cut his wrist this time.  As parents it is hard to believe that a 10 year old would have the mind capacity to make a plan and follow through with it.

There has to be more that can be done for our children.  I have decided to take a stand.  I write to anyone who will listen.  I have taken a picture of him and blew it up so everyone at the school district will never forget his name or face at the next school board meeting.  The school told me not to talk about it but by not talking about it I am only adding to the problem and not the solution.

Suicide is rare at 10 years old so everyone needs to know that education needs to start earlier than middle school or high school.  It needs to start now, in kindergarten where kids are the most impressionable.  The parents need to be held accountable as well as the schools.  More people need to be involved and aware.  Ignorance is no excuse. 

My son will not be a suicide statistic.  I will fight to keep his story alive, keep the schools educated, and keep parents aware that it does affect everyone. I’m his advocate, his voice, and hope that others will know they are not alone.

One Year Anniversary

Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.

The Accidental Bully

Anyone can become a bully, even if they didn’t mean to. “The Accidental Bully” shows how one teen can go from an innocent post to a cyber bully with one simple click. Stop and think before you hit send. Be part of the solution – not the problem. Bullying is never funny.

Stand Up

Hiding in the corner from those people who make fun of me,
The kicked, they pushed, they punched and the stole all of my dignity

And I am not afraid, and I am not afraid,
To raise against a blade

Oh, there is a warrior inside of me,
A fearless man from the cavalry
He’ll never turn down a fight,
But he is trapped away inside

And I am not afraid, and I am not afraid,
To raise against a blade

These words won’t bring me down tonight,
These words won’t bring me down tonight

Sticks and stones may break my bones,
But words, words won’t cut my soul

Sticks and stones may break my bones,
But words, words won’t cut my soul

Sometimes I stay up at night,
Thinking of the day that passed
Gathering up my courage so this feeling will no longer last

And I am not afraid, and I am not afraid,
To raise against a blade

These words won’t bring me down tonight
These words won’t bring me down tonight

Sticks and stones may break my bones,
But words, words won’t cut my soul

Sticks and stones may break my bones,
But words, words won’t cut my soul

a voice that is in need to be heard

I lived life as if everyday was going to be my last… years back I went to this school where you have to be a somebody or you get kicked… and as the story goes I became my class’ punching bag and stress ball. I spent most of the years hanging out in the clinic, eating lunch under the stairs, and if "something" is happening in the stairs I spend lunch in the comfort room. People there would make me carry a microwave from one building to the other, will always target me in soccer and dodge ball because they see that I am the weakest out of all of them and literally I had no friends. I could not act upon it and until this moment I feel as though they will be back for me and they will come again and hurt me. I have had two to three suicide attempts already luckily I am still alive as of this moment because I realize what I’ll be leaving behind once I am gone.

I’m 17 and I am in college now, Dream big, yet start small and that is why I have created a focus group and a signature campaign around our school in which the same problem is now being addressed. I may still be scared but reading all of this I feel that I am not alone. I am also a voice that is in need to be heard, ;I am a fighter because of all of you and I thank you for all of the confidence boost.

No one should experience this, no one has the right to make you feel like you are a nobody. Yes, they do have the right to speak but that doesn’t necessarily mean that they have a right to hurt someone. 🙂

VALUES

i always tried to stay away
from things that would make me stray
like smoking, drugs and alcohol
so i could stand proud and tall
peer pressure i did not give into
just to earn a friend or two
i made a promise through the years
to always keep my values clear
teach children to love and not hate
so they can walk a path thats straight
and not grow up like others do
who never have a single clue
what is right and what is wrong
becuase they werent taught to be strong
when situations come around
that build them up or knock them down
dont spread rumors about people
when you know that its not real
kindness goes a long long way
if you use it every day

No More

She sits in the corner hallway,
As the students pass on by,
Abused and bullied every day,
Such pain she can only cry…
…
No one understands her,
She a sweet as she can be,
But because she’s a little different,
They bring her to her knees…
…
How could they be so mean to her?
And call her all those names,
Do they know the pain it caused?
To the bullies it’s a game…
…
Her heart is torn to pieces,
Her soul is torn in two,
All because of Bullying,
And all because of you…
…
But one guy see’s her crying,
And comes to wipe her tears,
He tells her he’ll protect her,
And take away her fears…
…
He’s tired of seeing the treatment,
Of what these kids have done,
She’s on her knees in the corner,
With no where else to run…
…
He takes her hand and holds her up,
And turns and faces the class,
And without a word being spoken,
They all know he’ll kick their a**…
…
His eyes can tell the story,
The bullying will cease,
She now has his protection,
And now she will be free…
…
It’s been a year or maybe more,
Since a smile has been on her face,
But because of him she smiles again,
This football player full of grace…
…
Proudly he walks her to her class,
And now they treat her nice,
Because someone took notice,
That the bullying wasn’t right…
…
So when you see this happen,
You need to stand up tall
And let them know it’s going to stop,
No more bullying in these halls…

To This Day Project – Shane Koyczan

“My experiences with violence in schools still echo throughout my life but standing to face the problem has helped me in immeasurable ways.

Schools and families are in desperate need of proper tools to confront this problem. This piece is a starting point.” – Shane

http://tothisdayproject.com/

Beauty

these days girls dont understand
they’re playing with a deadly hand
when they dont stop and realize
there is no need to disguise
how they look inside and out
that’s not what beauty is about
diet pills and never eating
makes their body take a beating
all because they want to be
as thin as models on t.v.
images around the world
are scarring self esteem of girls
who think they will never fit in
unless they are pretty and thin
why cant they just realize
its not whats before their eyes
that makes them who they really are
its only whats inside their hearts
that proves how special they can be
giving them their true beauty

Couldn’t Stay Strong

Stop bullying.

Stop suicide.

Self harm and eating disorders (from being bullied) are real.

Next time you pick on someone, look in the mirror. Im sure youre not the perfect image either.

Y’all can get through this storm. Just wait for it to clear.